There’s something about hags and their gays that is parallel to a person and their therapist. My whole gay life, I’ve been the go-to “venting” buddy for all the girls in my own life. When I realized that other homosexual guys were in the same boat, I began to ponder the theory that without gay guys, who the hell would women vent to? Not only that, but there is absolutely no other person in the world that gets the patience to hear the kind of stuff our hags spew out. I am not “Homo”wonkanobi .

Don’t get me wrong, I really do love me a good therapy program. I’m sure I’m not the only homosexual in the world to state that. We like to behave like we have the answer to all the world’s problems – and let’s face it, most of enough time we do.

Whenever your hag phone calls you crying about her boyfriend not paying attention to her which her roommates being truly a bitch or her job sucks, we sit their laughing and nodding and assuring her she deserves just of happiness. We say “perhaps you should speak to them about it,” not thinking of the results of course. Instantly, they’ve used this nice bit of advice as an invitation to a nightly therapy session. Then every evening – like clockwork – you can hear the latest information about what’s taking place in her life and just like that, you have grown to be her free psycho-analyst.

The worst part of it is that generally, when the gay friend tries to talk their hag about his problems, she actually is often too busy or unavailable. It happens. You understand it does. Look out, because too much of this will weigh you down!

Don’t get me wrong. I love girls in my life, but the fact that the majority of other gays are going through the same issue appears to say something about this hidden dilemma. What must happen is a well-balanced vent writing system. She lets you know about her problems, you tell her about yours. The next time she calls you or knocks on your bedroom door to vent about her problems, when it reaches the 30 minute mark, direct the discussion towards you, with sayings like:

“I know. I feel the same way. Like today when I…”
“I totally understand. Understand that time I…”
“I feel you. I get so pissed off when…”
They are easy transitional phrases that can spin the therapy session around. Watch the appearance on her behalf face. If she discovers it shocking that you are discussing you, perhaps you should just leave the conversation. If she’s been spewing her guts out going back fifty percent hour and doesn’t have five minutes to hear your problems, the type of friend is that? The most severe scenario is when she discovers an excuse to leave once she realizes you aren’t going to hear her any more, by saying she’s to do laundry or she needs to clean or she must eat. Blah, blah, blah….

Look. The bottom line is this. We are excellent to speak to. We’ve been through a lot of circumstances in our lives that required much needed reflection, which explains why we can provide significant advice. Our view on situations is usually pretty accurate. The girls know this. Help them out! Be a good friend. If they want to vent their problems to you, let them! It’s the best quality gay men can give with their friends. Just beware when the camaraderie turns into limitless parades of therapy.

Unless the venting is a two way street, my advice is cross to the other side before you get knocked taken care of.