Do Gay Men Fear Intimacy?


How To Stop Your Fear Of Gay Dating And Gay Relationships

We all want to live that life of love: using in the carriage with your boyfriend under the stars, playing footsie under the table at the restaurant, holding hands while you’re walking home, and cuddling while you’re watching the latest bout of Project Runway. Each one of these fantasies can be so mind-boggling that whenever we don’t own it, we believe that something is wrong. Most people will be quick to “correct it” that they’ll accept the first person who gives them any attention. Then finally, all will be right with the world because now they have a sweetheart!

Why are folks so desperate to truly have a relationship?

In the gay community especially, developing a partner can be healing. We’ve someone that cares for all of us, someone who views us for who we are without judgments. It’s like our past is beginning to repair itself. The security of experiencing a sweetheart can certainly be priceless. According to Psychologists, the sensation of “I’m not in this by itself” can develop the series between melancholy and contentment. After all, the stresses are much less and the rewards are a lot more which can result in a more happy disposition.

We’ve all met those who find themselves too scared to truly have a boyfriend and when asked why, they often react with a prideful answer. “Who needs one!” or “I don’t have the persistence!” or “I get uninterested too easily!” You will be surprised to discover that in recent Psychological studies, a great deal of people who stay one subconsciously feel that they don’t DESERVE to have a sweetheart. Maybe this is the reason why Oprah said, “You need to complete yourself first, before you allow someone else in your life.”

We’ve seen evidence of this in folks who are serial daters – not being able to keep a man for longer than three weeks at a time. In most cases, these folks don’t feel just like they deserve the love of another, whilst they own it! This leads to a distorted connection between the two and it’ll always end eventually.

I just want to say, there is nothing at all wrong with being single. Having someone else in your life to take into account can be quite task full. However, everyone one is individual and just how our bodies work make needing a boyfriend much more challenging. When two people touch, electric pulses instantly give us emotions of comfort and perhaps, an addictive high to displace our panic. This touch-therapy is often found in Special Ed classes.

The touching thing can only just lead to a lot. Now continuing a relationship means a lot more than ridding your anxiousness, in fact it can cause more of it. Social networking has created a fresh spawn of jealous boyfriends who wish to know what your location is all the time. Financial situations lead to many battles during bill payments. Cell phones can limit personal space. A 21st century-model partner is no joke.

Now that homosexual relationship has passed, gay men everywhere are feeling the pressure to find their future husband. Since we can in fact be wedded now, has it created a more intense dating environment? Have we become much too picky for our very own good?

Dating is meant to be enough time where we decide what we should like and don’t like. Eventually, through our own experiences, we can find the perfect man since now we know which qualities to look for. But we won’t reach that time if we don’t put ourselves out there.

A single person who anxieties rejection from potential enthusiasts is acting in response to the way they feel inside. The world is a different place now, and days gone by is days gone by. No one should be scared to receive love from others – just so long as you have love to give back, and you won’t have enough love if you don’t source it for yourself.

Gay Relationship Coaching – Fear Of Intimacy For Gay Men Over 40 from Gay Matchmaker And Coach on Vimeo.


Alex779 January 31, 2018 - 4:36 am

Of course it’s all about your fear and traumatic experience in the past. Many people don’t want to let anyone in their life after some hard break up or betrayal. In fact it’s easier to be alone and tell these stories that you don’t need anyone. Maybe you need to meet someone really special so that you’ll break your walls or maybe you just need to learn to trust people around you.

Freddy Sánchez January 31, 2018 - 4:09 pm

It depends a lot on how do their parents raise him, his relationship with the mother and the father. Actually, straight couples also have the same intimacy problem. I think it also depends on how confident they feel about themselves. Intimacy is important. Do you know what helps? A good underwear that makes you feel sexy and turns on your partner.

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