Relationship Success Opinion for Coupled Gay Men
How Much Sex You Should Be Having? Truth is that there is no magic number that will work for every couple. We’re different. Nonetheless, it is possible to figure out what level of frequency works for your relationship. Maybe you’ve skipped dinner and gone straight for dessert, but if you’re skipping all of your meals to have sex instead, you might be having too much of it.
ONCE I was in my early-twenties, I had a lot of sex – a lot. The very first thing I would make each day wasn’t coffee, but a Craigslist publishing or Grindr blast. Later on I’d check my Yahoo! take into account any filtered men that might have slipped through my inbox. I kept informing myself love was coming, until 1 day it strike me.
I was on the point of meet a few friends for dinner in Hollywood once i received a Grindr message. I held it on all day long so it didn’t shock me. “Where are you? I’m nearby” he said. I known the face. It was a guy I had developed amazing sex with the month before. Rigtht after the message was a text message from my pal: “I’m almost there!” he wrote. Needless to say, I composed him back and informed him I’d be considered a little past due…
To make a long tale short, I missed the dinner.
When the guy still left my apartment, I texted my friend and asked if we can meet for wines. “It’s alright man,” he published, “Neglect it.” I then found out later the dinner was designed to be a nonchalant setup with his friend from work whom he thought want me personally. As I sat laying on my bed – jeans still down and unbuttoned – I finally known where I was at. My little habit acquired converted into a problem, a large one.
Not merely was I placing the “hunt” for sex above the majority of things in life, but the habit of meaningless sex was starting to desensitize my entire being; so much so that my conscience, my entire perception of logic was becoming fractured. Though I was telling myself I used to be searching for love, the only thing I used to be searching for was an enthusiast.
Of course, this isn’t the situation for everyone. Hookup applications like Grindr have millions of users across the world and the majority of them know how to control themselves. But what I’ve been seeing in the homosexual community has less to do with their ability to restrain, and more to do with the availability in general.
It takes nothing at all to find sex, and because from it we’ve found that sex doesn’t have to mean anything if we don’t want it to. More often than not, it’s harmless. But there comes a period when sex becomes a replacement or perhaps a distraction. That’s when it can take a sour convert.
You’d be surprised just how many homosexual guys take this habit with them into relationships. Some build their whole infrastructure on sex, often forgetting to include love. They fail to realize whenever sex is the main thing tying them together, it’s only heading to end when the sex gets bad. Again, sex serves as a blindfold keeping love beyond arm’s reach.
In the gay community, being promiscuous appears to be no big deal. Though promiscuity exists across all orientations, I can’t help but question if it’s the take action that’s keeping many gay men from learning how for connecting. With so many digital gadgets, we’ve neglected how to socialize with one another. Is the next logical thing, then, to forget how to love? I am hoping not.
Sex is an awesome thing. I highly recommend having it, but like any tune you continuously play on your iPod, it will get old after a while. Because sex and love are linked to the same part of our brains, too much of either will always affect the other. Though it could seem such as a simple distraction at first, the reality of the problem is it’s all part of a mental and emotional equation. When something is considered one too many times, eventually the whole problem will be remaining unresolved.